Where am I now…
Did I ever achieve anything
My heart got stranded along the way
And my morals all came tumbling down
I found fame…and it was a whore.
Every night I went out to perform
Fans wanted that piece of me
Slowly at first, and then they had to have it
That piece I should never have let go of…my soul
But I craved the adoration, I wanted the praise.
I was so desperate and fickle and weak
Giving in to the tide of fame and glory
Till slowly I paid the price and it wore me down
Whisky never touching the side of my throat
Throwing it down so fast it had no chance.
The first time I hit the Quaaludes was out of this world
But one thing leads to another
And another
And another
The depths of Hell are paved with so-called good times.
And yet fame persists, but only for so long
The pull of the Snake becomes far too much to take
Till there I lay in a heap of self-induced disgust and vomit
My own depravity, my own failure
No lower, I could go no lower.
—————– ** ——————
Sometime we are helped when we least deserve it
And the love of another is all it really ever takes
I’d come to the end of my infamous road
Of booze and drugs and frightening snakes
I was nursed back to life once more.
My thoughts are all jumbled of times from back then
The music still reaches my core like a balm
Such heroes I followed, so many of them died
Living like I did where our brains would get fried
Yet so few of us finding a way to come home.
But yet here I am, my mind now at ease
My road is quite peaceful, yet still sometimes stressed
And my body though kicked and scarred from the fight
Seems always a survivor, a stayer with force
And for that I am grateful, as I should be of course.
Fame, was it worth it, I ask myself that
When I let my mind wander, as I sometimes do
I know that I’m glad that I reached to this end
But I’m only the proof of a far greater love
Of the woman beside me, and that Guardian above.
©Joe Wilson – After the fame and the frightening snakes…2015